Meditation is Mental Exercise
“My mind’s too busy to meditate - I can never make it go still.”
Does this sound like you?
So many people stop meditating because they think that being distracted means they’re doing it wrong. They quit even though they know deep down that a few minutes a day could help them be more creative, focussed and energised. Many people give up because they can’t get their mind to become still. But that’s from the movies. Meditation is much more practical than that.
Meditation is the art of deliberately and continuously directing your attention.
It doesn’t need to be any more complicated or woo woo than that.
In the beginning, your meditation practice may just be an awareness of where your attention really is. You may find this disheartening initially. I know I did. But becoming aware of your distractions, rather than suppressing them, is part of the process.
Your Attention Is A Mental Muscle
If you haven’t been exercising much then sprinting 100m will be hard work. Getting your legs and arms to pump fast would be a challenge in itself, let alone sustaining it over distance. You’d be out of breath.
It’s fair to say that trying to run fast would make you aware of how unfit you really are. But if your goal was to run more often, to get faster, to run a 5k or even a marathon, you’d see this as a necessary part of the journey. You’d know that physical exertion is uncomfortable. How much you’re able to overcome this is a sign of your growing fitness level. Being out-of-breath is feedback not failure.
Meditation is mental exertion. It is continual redirection of your attention to something of your choice - be it your breath, a feeling, a vision or an object. This takes effort. Because you are voluntarily taking hold of your attention, you may become aware for the first time of how difficult this truly is, how often your attention drifts, wanders and pings from thoughts about your past to things you have to do later.
Every time you realise you’re not focussed is a victory. Every time you recapture your attention, if only for an instant, is a win. Repeating this over and over is like doing a dumb-bell curl in the gym. Over time your mental focus muscle becomes stronger.
So recognising you’re distracted is not failing. Just like being out of breath when you’re running is not a failure either. They’re a sign that you’re doing it right. Both are part of the process of mental and physical transformation.
Why Laziness Is Helpful
We’re hardwired to conserve energy. Running away from danger was far more important for our evolutionary ancestors than going out for a jog - what if you needed that energy later on to escape an attack from a predator? Best rest now while you get the chance. You’re predisposed to do the easiest thing, so you can save energy down the line if you need it to survive.
And it’s far easier to let your mind wander than keep it focussed. It takes less energy. Just like it’s much easier to lie on the couch than go for a run.
Your resistance to focussing is natural. Your tendency to be distracted is normal. It’s easier to drift on the tide than row against the current. I think that knowing this is extremely important because you’re not doing anything wrong when your mind wanders during meditation. It’s completely normal and to be expected.
Meditation allows you to become aware that most of the time, you are drifting along on an automatic current of habitual thoughts, feelings and behaviours. Gaining this insight can be overwhelming at first. You’re changing years and years of habits, many of which you may not even have known existed.
Clearing Out The Clutter
It’s a bit like moving home. When you start taking stock of everything you own it’s often amazing just how much junk you’ve collected over the years. A third of a bottle of limoncello from a trip to Milan in 2011, countless unpaired socks, old tins of paint, mini shoe polishing kits from some forgotten hotel stay, reams of unread magazines… There’s an element of mediation that is you starting to look at your mental clutter. Becoming aware of the clutter is the first step towards organising it.
Like building a running habit, the more you run, the easier it becomes to run faster or longer. Whilst running is likely to become more enjoyable as your body adapts, it will never be frictionless. You will always need to make effort. Some days will feel easier and others harder.
Your meditation practice is the same. Whilst you may start to enjoy the process more, there will always be an element of challenge. That’s growth. That’s you rowing against the current. You might not always look forward to doing it (that’s your brain and body trying to conserve energy) but you’ll begin to notice subtle changes. Maybe it will feel like you can hold your attention for longer, or you can find your attentional groove a bit quicker than usual. Or perhaps your jumble of thoughts seems slightly less chaotic than before.
There are many more benefits but these are just a few signs on your journey towards wielding your attention with more purpose and skill.
I love this quote about running.
“No matter how slow you go, you’re lapping everyone on the couch.”
My version for meditation is a bit less pithy but here it is anyway.
“No matter how long you meditate, you’re lapping everyone doomscrolling Instagram.”
So if you’ve ever given up on meditation because you didn’t reach a zen-like state in under five minutes then you’re not alone. I’m pretty sure no-one ever has. Keep going if your goal is a little more mental clarity, control and peace. The effort will always be worth it.
